If you find me, you do not understand I'm autistic. As is commonplace with autistic women, I have learned to imitate certain social skills, although I am more eccentric and louder than others. I do not have any filters and I can speak with the same ease I used to eat that morning or the time when my ex-girlfriend fell in my face and could not breathe.

Also, I get bored and tremble when I am in groups of people. Everything should be in number and I am very sensitive to noises, smells, strong lighting and specific textures.

I first retired from another girl when I was 11 and made sex for the first time with a woman when I was 20. I started dating only with women at the age of 25. Today I am 30 years old and the world of lesbians seems more tedious than ever. Noises, dirty tables, terrible toilets are torture for me. Not touched by the hardships you face when trying to become part of a social group. Often, they see me crooked or disturb me with answers like "I did this once." Usually, after these happenings, I go home and eat McDonald's. I would like to find my partner at work or at a social event, but it was very difficult for me to become acquainted with lesbian or other bisexuals.

I have been having sex for two years; I prefer to meet the needs of myself with vibrators. But I would like to be with someone someday. Right now, I'm just happy, waiting for a woman who loves me as I am.

Written by an anonymous woman for The Guardian