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Between us: I love my husband, but I'm tired of his nerves!

Shkruar nga Anabel

28 Shkurt 2025

Between us: I love my husband, but I'm tired of his nerves!

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Between us: I love my husband, but I'm tired of his nerves!

"When I was a teenager, I swore I would never marry someone like my father: angry, addicted, often violent: both verbally and physically. But life happened and now I've been married for 23 years to someone who reminds me of that every day: my husband is just so angry as hell!"

Whether it's a Sunday outing with the kids or planning the budget for next month, he can't help but make a scene that ruins everyone's day: including his own.

When I was 19 and rushed into marriage with him simply to escape the hassle and chaos that was going on in my house, I was more…zealous about being his 'healer'.

In our early days, I found it very easy to stay calm and convince him to do the same when he was irritated by a wrong overtaking in the middle of traffic. I also understood his futile outbursts of jealousy towards me, as a cry for help from the emotional insecurity he might feel. I also endured the nights when he ruined family dinners and made the children tremble with fear to say one more word.

I remembered my mother from when we were little, whenever my dad drank and hit us, he would force us to lower our heads and apologize for 'making him angry.' But I could never do that for my children.

I can see that they love their father very much and why they are afraid of his hasty reactions. I love him too for all his sacrifices and hard work to increase the well-being of our little family. But he was only doing his duty, just like me.

I'm angry because I can no longer understand him, I can no longer change my attitude as soon as I hear the sound of his car entering the yard. I can no longer blame any kind of childhood trauma that turned him into the person he is, but who is doing such a thing to me? We have an incredible pressure on women to be the regulators of the entire family environment, never giving ourselves a moment to breathe.

"I can no longer be my mother, who endured much more than I did and ultimately forgave everything to my father, leaving deep scars on us and her children for all that we took on their problems. I have done it so far, but it is time to think about my children and myself: I can no longer tolerate history repeating itself."

Note: The article has been adapted by the editorial staff for editorial purposes and clarity. Copyright Anabel.al / Reprinting without the permission of the editorial staff is prohibited.