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5 signs that show you've crossed professional boundaries with that colleague at work

Shkruar nga Anabel

17 Prill 2025

5 signs that show you've crossed professional boundaries with that

If we're not lucky, our jobs and the office politics that come with them can add up to five days of fatigue a week. Friendships with our colleagues can be a blessing, but when it comes to the "work woman" or "work man," these relationships can get very complicated, very quickly.

A divorce lawyer shared five signs that indicate your relationship with your coworker has crossed too far.

Preferential communication:

If your first instinct is to text your coworker instead of your partner about important news, accomplishments, or concerns, that's a red flag. This is an "intimate imbalance" and indicates that something is wrong in your relationship and that your connection with your "work spouse" has crossed a line.

Comparing your partner to your work colleague:

If you find yourself making mental or verbal comparisons between how your coworker and your partner handle situations, it's a quick way to build resentment. Worse, these comparisons are often unfair, as the situations you face with your "work spouse" are completely different from the ones like financial responsibilities or parenting decisions you face with your real partner.

Discussing marital problems with a colleague:

If you confide in your coworker about your marital issues, you create a dangerous triangle that can emotionally distance you from your partner and create inappropriate intimacy with your coworker.

Hiding communications:

If you feel compelled to delete messages, hide conversations, or keep the extent of your relationship with your coworker a secret, something serious is going on. This is a signal that boundaries have been crossed.

Feelings of jealousy about a colleague's personal life:

If you feel jealous of your coworker's relationship and life, then you've crossed some boundaries. This is a "signal" that the relationship has crossed beyond acceptable boundaries and it's time to fix things.

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Source: Your Tango